FREE MONKEY
Because hey, who doesn't want a free monkey?

Here's what our happy customers have to say!

Marvin Farnnum

"I thought my life was ruined when I lost my job at the plant, but now I have a free monkey!"

Karen Lipschitz

"The first monkey made a huge mess, but once the second monkey arrived it cleaned up after the first one! Now I need a third monkey to clean up after the second one."

Eric Ludsill

"I've been burned by those fly-by-night free monkey services in the past, but freemonkey.online is by far heads and prehensile tails above the rest!"

Antoine Blasei

"Why is this monkey in my house?! I didn't even order one! Who are you people?!"